10 rules for the first date after divorce! It’s been a while since you’ve gone on a first date, and it can be an awkward experience. You might not know what to talk about, how to treat the other person, or even if they’re single. You need to know how to manage your next first date after divorce. It’s been a long time since you’ve been on a first date, and now that you’re divorced, you feel like it might be time to start dating again.
You may have heard from friends or seen in movies how tough the first date rules are after divorce. There is no need to worry about this! Here are some things to keep in mind when going on your next first date after divorce:
10 Rules for The First Date After Divorce
Divorce can be a tough thing to get through. You’re going to need some time and luck before you get back out there again. Here are 10 rules for the first date after a divorce, so you can start moving on in no time!
Rule #1: Don’t Expect Too Much
When you’ve been out of the dating game for a while, especially after divorce, you can easily get your hopes up when it comes to meeting someone new. The truth is that most people are not looking for serious relationships when they are on first dates, so don’t be disappointed if anything serious doesn’t come from it right away.
Rule #2: Watch Your Body Language
Your body language speaks a lot more than you might think. Make sure when on the date to lean in and make eye contact with your date when they are speaking, don’t let your phone interrupt the conversation, and try not to fidget or play with things.
Rule #3: Practice Good Hygiene
They say that first impressions are everything, which couldn’t be truer when it comes to dating. Make sure when getting ready for the date you use a nice smelling soap or cologne to make your smell pleasant, wear clean clothes, choose lovely hairstyles, take a shower before the date to avoid any unwanted smells, and make sure your breath is fresh as well.
Rule #4: Pay Attention
When you’re on a first date after a divorce, it’s easy to be caught up in your head thinking about everything else, but this is never good for conversation! To avoid awkward silences or the person feeling unimportant, pay attention to the other person’s responses and talk about what they like.
Rule #5: Whether You Should Date Or Not Is Your Decision
You may be tempted to date a lot after your divorce. Because you have been away from the dating scene for a long time. However, if this is not what YOU want, then don’t do it! When dating someone new after a divorce, you’re doing it because YOU want to and not just because you think you should.
Rule #6: Give Yourself Time To Adjust
After divorce, it takes time to get back in the game and feel comfortable again. Don’t be surprised if meeting new people is out of your comfort zone at first; remember that this will slowly get easier with practice.
Rule #7: Re-calibrate The Way You Think About Relationships
You will realize that people are different in relationships than they are when you first meet them. Be open-minded for this reason, and remember to approach every new relationship with an open mind.
Rule #8: Don’t Be Afraid Of Dating Someone Your Ex’s Age
Many newly divorced people fear this, but it’s not that big of a deal. If you meet someone the same age as your ex, there’s nothing wrong with dating them! You are not still hung up on your ex just because you’re dating someone their age, so don’t let this rule stop you from meeting an amazing new person.
Rule #9: If You’re Not Interested, Let Them Know
Don’t lead someone on just because you’re nervous about hurting their feelings. If you know that you’re not interested in a relationship with them, then be honest and let them down gently as soon as possible to find someone interested in dating them.
Rule #10: Try To Have Fun!
The first date after the divorce should be fun and exciting. Don’t stress yourself out about it too much, and remember to relax and enjoy the company of someone new! After all, first dates are meant to introduce you to new people and see if there’s a connection between the two of you. So try your best not to stress over the little things and enjoy yourself.
Read Also: How Long After Mediation Is Divorce Final?
What Should I Do On My First Date After Divorce?
If it’s been a while since you’ve been on a date, then the thought of going out with someone new can be pretty intimidating. After divorce, your first date will allow you to see if this person and connection is worth pursuing and having more dates with.
First dates don’t have to be scary, especially because they are just the first date after divorce. If it goes well, then the worst that will happen is you’ll say goodbye and continue your life, but if sparks fly, then that’s when things start to get interesting! Regardless of what happens on this date, remember not to judge someone because it’s only their first date with you. While there are no hard and fast rules to follow on a first date, there are a few things you can do to make sure your first date after divorce is a success.
#1: Figure Out What You Want From The Relationship
Before going out with someone new, you must figure out what you’re looking for in this relationship. Whether you’re looking to find a long-term relationship or want to get back into the dating scene, then make that clear from the beginning.
#2: Remember You Are More Than Your Divorce
One of the hardest things about going on a date after a divorce is not feeling like it. You’ll be judged because of your past decisions and previous relationships. Try not to bring up your divorce on a first date after a divorce, but try not to let it define you if it does happen. Remember, there are so many other amazing things about you that will do nothing to do with your past marriage or relationships!
#3: Pick A Place Where There Are Plenty Of People
This is a good idea for the first date after divorce because it helps prevent any awkward moments of silence as you get to know one another.
#4: Try Not To Talk About Previous Relationships On The First Date
While your new date may bring up that they are divorced or in the process of getting a divorce, try your best not to go into detail about your previous marriage or relationships. It will likely make them feel uncomfortable, and you don’t want that.
What To Talk About On A First Date After Divorce?
As many people know, dating can be pretty intimidating, especially when it’s your first date after divorce. There are so many things one must think of like; what should I wear, what am I going to talk about, what do I tell them about my life, etc. It can be hard to think of all these things at the moment! Because of this, you must plan out an idea of what you’d like to talk about before going on your first date with someone new.
How Soon After A Divorce Should You Date?
The age-old question many people wonder about is how soon should you start dating after your divorce. Well, there’s no right answer to this question. No one can tell you when is an appropriate time to begin dating because it depends on the divorced person.
However, if you feel you are ready to start dating again, you should do it when you’re comfortable! If this means waiting a few months after your divorce, then go for it. It’s better to start slow and feel good about your decision than jump in headfirst and possibly regret dating so soon.
Is It Wrong To Date Before The Divorce Is Final?
The short answer to this question is, yes. It’s possible that dating before your divorce is finalized can be viewed as wrong by the other party. If you’re thinking of starting a new relationship while you and your ex-spouse are still getting divorced, then both parties must try and see things from each other’s angles.
For example, it might be hard for your ex to understand why you’re dating someone new before the divorce is finalized and vice versa. If you decide to begin a new relationship while your divorce is still pending, keep this in mind, and try and make sure both parties are on the same page!
The Bottom Line
We’ve all heard it before, don’t rush into anything. As you venture out on your first date after a divorce, be sure to follow these 10 rules so that your expectations are set, and you can relax knowing there’s someone by your side who understands what you’re going through.
This is not the time for games or “small talk.” Be honest about how vulnerable you feel right now and communicate those feelings openly with whoever asks to take this journey with you. If they want to know more about you, then they will ask! And finally, if nothing else works, remember that laughter is always a great way of breaking the ice (and tension). Let us know in the comments below for more information.